Since joining AA this year, I feel like I’ve really taken off with my recovery. I’ve really taken to heart the AA message and have found some good friends. I’ve been to a meeting every day and have shared at nearly every meeting I’ve attended. I love the opportunity to share and put my thoughts into words.
However, I have made a grave error. Since I’ve been talking at meetings and sharing my feelings, thoughts, and emotions, I haven’t been having those same conversations with my wife. I have forgotten the most important person in the world to me!
I need to redouble my efforts! I need to get back to including her. I need to use meetings to share and explore what I’m going through in my recovery. I need meetings to hear how others have found direction from others. But then I need to distill those ideas down and share with my wife what I’m going through as well.
Houston, we have liftoff!
A rocket uses approximately 75% of its fuel for liftoff. This is the hardest part of the trip–escaping Earth’s gravity. Who would have thought? Gravity doesn’t seem that bad. It’s been pulling on us for years and we hardly notice it! Just wandering around in our daily stupor is easy. To join AA and pull out of our old lives and into a new reality takes a great amount of force!
This is a very frontloaded program. 90 meetings in 90 days takes a lot of effort. It’s not a difficult program, but it’s not easy. I was putting all my energy into the programs and my relationship with my wife was suffering for it.
Find Balance
Eventually, I can find balance. Eventually, I can learn to focus on my problems and give attention to my loved ones in the manner to which they have become accustomed. I will continue to work my program but with more balance. Once I’ve escaped the gravity of my old ways of thinking, I can cruise along on my newfound trajectory needing nearly as much rocket fuel, and I will be able to make time for the love of my life.
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Good thoughts John. I too have found including my wife in all my life’s new found adventures is essential. As a matter of fact, she joins me occasionally attending meetings. Folks have gotten to know her and she is famous for her apple cake.
We are coming up on 49 years in April. Her vows at the alter were made to God, not me. “For better or worse, richer or poorer, till death do we part.” How can I not involve her in the journey?
A couple of months ago, my wife said “Honey, I do not recognize the man you’re becoming from the man you were.”